On my way to lunch, I passed this particular asshat on his way in.
AH: What’re you, leaving?
MJ: Running away; I saw you coming.
AH: Better run faster.
. . . On the whole, this would have been significantly less disturbing without our last meeting:
AH: *in a voice and manner that reminds me why young children should not talk to strangers* Do you want a piece of candy, little girl?
*Entire office freezes in horrified silence.*
MJ: Well, that’s creepy.
You found that funny. Huh.
That is why I hope to be a hermit when I grow up.
Good luck with that?